Greetings, mercenaries. This is your former employer, Ray Bann.
I am disappointed to announce that our campaign was a failure. We were unable to purchase Fredmann Co. itself, but were able to acquire some of its subsidiary brands. Rest assured, our efforts were significant. Mr. Sale's grasp on the bitlands has been chipped. It is merely a matter of time before his empire crumbles.
As an employer, I am proud of the sheer amount of effort put into completing my tasks. Let me be honest with you, creating an entire map, Curlytowers, just to complete my second challenge was extremely resourceful. That said, I am far more pleased with those of you that did not simply quit after your shift ended. These individuals, through blood and ragequits managed to complete the spirit of the challenges and earned themselves many commissions throughout our campaign.
On that note, I am pleased to announce our winners.
Tiers andreyyy
Arctic
Imp
Poniman
Robin Walker
B-tunez
Dan
ILF
May Hegehog
Prime
Atlus
BassMakesPaste
bobtehnoob
bullets (obviously)
Cabalier
Cara
Derpduck
Heenok
Roflolian
Sparky
S-Z
t_
the useless soldier
YB
Tier 5 (25%):
Greenback death particles for one class
Tier 4 (50%):
Greenback particles for 3 classes
or
Top hat for one class
Tier 3 (70%):
Greenback particles for all classes
or
Top hat for 3 classes
or
Top hat and golden monocle for 1 class
or
All Tier 4 awards
Tier 1(95%):
Top hat and golden monocle for all classes + greenback particles
Tier 0(100%):
Tier 1 awards + This year's Haxxy for one class
Medals Dynamic Duo: May
2spooky4u: Heenok, May, Derpduck, and Just Somthin
B-Ball Blitz: Prime, Heenok, and bullets
Glory Days: Prime, Heenok, B-tunez, and the useless soldier
Elton Jump-athon: Spazz
Rebel-ution: Derpduck, Sparky, and Heenok
Army of One: Sparky, and Heenok
It is my sincerest hope that you all enjoy your new purchases from Bann Mercantile Group. We take great pride in our craftsmanship while working tirelessly to ensure proper quality control. Rest assured, you are all being given pure* 100% Canadium items, just as you were promised since the beginning.
Product distribution will occur whenever our development team sees fit.
*Alloyed.
Do be wary when dealing with Mr. Sale's products in the near future, his inside traders seem to be pushing for a brand change. Avoid the gaudy Northamericum, or whatever they call it now; its golden hue is no match for the metallic grey sheen of our 100% legally acquired Canadium, non-bloodied diamond rings or even our Ebola-free uniforms.
As per your contract, I will call upon you for future campaigns. Hm? You did not sign a contract?
In that case, Mercantiles, would you care for one last drink before you go?
Author
Topic: The Results of Our Campaign (Read 4298 times)
